There are two types of little girls in this world: those who play house and those who play wedding. In reality, things aren’t that different once we grow up. Some women can’t wait to plan their weddings and others can’t wait to actually be married. I can’t tell you how many people warned me about the “morning after.” The morning after the wedding, that is. People described the comedown you feel after the biggest, most important day of your life is over. But for me, the wedding was just the beginning. I couldn’t wait to start my life with my new husband and actually be married. Not everyone feels that way. If you are unsure which category you fit into, here are our top 15 signs you are ready to tie the knot.
15 Sure Signs You’re Ready for Marriage:
1. You’ve stopped thinking in “me” terms and started thinking in “we” terms.
When responding to a recent email, I found myself writing “we” several times. We would love to meet for dinner. We love that restaurant. Obviously, I meant my husband and myself but even before we wed, I thought of us as a team. No one is saying you need to sacrifice your independence, but if you notice you automatically include your significant other in your thinking, then you are thinking in we.
2. You think beyond the wedding.
Some women are just wedding crazy. They create vision boards, Excel spreadsheets, and PowerPoint presentations, all in the hopes of planning the perfect day. But they haven’t thought past that perfect day. If you find yourself thinking about the day after the wedding, and the day after that, and the day after that… you are probably more into being married than just a big white dress.
3. You’ve stopped checking out other guys.
Remember that hot bartender at your favorite dive? He doesn’t even register any longer. Forget daydreaming about him. Yeah, you can appreciate a hot guy, but the only dude who makes your heart flutter is your future-hubby. And that’s a good thing.
4. You’ve stopped playing “what if” about the past.
Yes, you are super in love with your future spouse, but there’s always been that nagging feeling that you never had closure with your college BF. Until now. Suddenly, you hear his name and just shrug. You no longer wonder what would have been, could have been, or should have been. He’s the past and you’re all about the future.
5. You are making plans together for the future.
So the wedding is over…now what? You guys have been making plans. Not just dinner plans, but real, serious, joint-bank-account plans. You no longer wonder if you guys will spend Thanksgiving together, now it’s a matter of whose family you spend it with. No longer do you consider just your own future happiness, but you’ve made your future hubby’s happiness a priority as well.
6. You’re daydreaming about children.
We all played house growing up and sometimes this involved our pretend children. Suddenly, you are no longer thinking in terms of pretend. You’ve started daydreaming about what your future children will look like. Not in vague terms, but actually wondering if they’ll have your hubby’s blue eyes, dimpled chin, or wavy hair. And you can’t wait to find out!
7. You don’t find his little quirks annoying.
He snores—so what? He leaves the seat up—no big deal! He leaves the cabinet doors open in every room…okay, that last one is from personal experience. But suddenly, your SO’s little quirks don’t seem so annoying any longer. Actually, they’ve become quite endearing. And when suddenly he puts the toilet seat down, you’re concerned something is wrong.
8. You share in the finances.
While this might seem a no-brainer for some, you’d be surprised how many couples keep separate bank accounts even after they’re married. Once you start living with your future significant other, if you’re both thinking “this thing we’ve got going is permanent,” opening a joint account is a big sign that you both are in it for the long haul. Combining finances (direct deposit, bills, and paychecks) immediately ties the two of you together and opens a window into how you run and organize your life.
9. You have no secrets from each other, even the weirdest ones.
Sometimes to relax, you like watching bad Bruce Willis movies while wearing facemasks and eating Ritz crackers in bed. I’m not saying I know anyone who does this, but it’s a little strange. It’s definitely not something you’ve shared with people in the past. But your soon-to-be Mr. thinks it’s adorable and has even sprung for a Netflix account so you can feed your Bruce Willis habit.
10. You feel comfortable being brutally honest and don’t worry that he’ll hate you.
Time to pluck those nose hairs. What’s the deal with that back hair? That joke about my mom…not funny. In the first blush of a new relationship, you walk a fine line between being lovey-dovey and being yourself. You don’t want to say anything that might hurt his feelings, no matter how true it may be. But once you know your relationship is for real, you realize being honest in every way is the best way to be. And you know he won’t hold it against you. He actually loves you more for it.
11. You’re OK when he’s brutally honest with you.
I never ever want to be told I look fine. It’s a four-letter word to me. Gorgeous? Okay. Horrible. Umm, okay. Just not FINE. It’s so blah sounding. My husband knows he can be honest with me and while yes, I may pout and complain, I never get mad at him. A big part of our relationship is built on pure honesty, and I wouldn’t change that. I know I can rely on him to keep it real when the going gets tough. And I need that. Most couples do.
12. You happily sacrifice for each other.
Suddenly your SO is happy to skip poker night with the guys or forgo his annual trip to Las Vegas. You didn’t ask him to and to be honest, he doesn’t even seem to care. Likewise, you spend your hard earned stash on that gadget he was eyeing instead of those gorgeous Ferragamo flats. It doesn’t even feel like a sacrifice. Seeing his happy, smiling face makes it all worth it.
13. You would trust him with your pets’ lives.
My hubs and I had barely been dating 18 months when my dog got really sick with pancreatitis. I had to fly to Los Angeles for a family obligation and left him in charge. My dog took a turn for the worse while I was away. My future-hubby carried my poor pup through the streets of New York, flagged down a police officer, and managed to get my baby to an emergency pet vet. Side note: My husband is not an animal person. He saved my pup’s life and proved that even though he thought dogs were kind of a waste of space, he would go to the ends of the Earth for me.
14. You just trust him.
You let him know your email passwords, bank account passwords, and pretty much any other personal information. You know he’ll only use them for good, like borrowing your email contacts to throw you a big ol’ surprise party.
15. Your favorite night out is actually now a night in together.
It used to be clubs, bottle service, and banquettes, but now you two prefer takeout, Netflix, and your couch. Forget FOMO. You’re all about your future DH (darling husband) and living in the moment. EOS (End of story – Ok, I made that one up!) So you might not fit every one of these points but even just a few demonstrate that you’re probably ready to take the plunge! What made you realize you’re ready for marriage? Join the convo by commenting below!