If you’re planning a wedding, chances are you’re feeling a little overwhelmed with all the “do’s and don’ts.” Worried about spending too much money or making a faux pas with the guest list? Put your fears aside, because here’s a list of common wedding planning myths that you probably believe, but simply aren’t true.
Top 16 Wedding Planning Myths:
1. You have to wear white.
While wearing a white dress is traditional, there is absolutely no reason why you have to conform. A secret task force won’t pop out of the bushes and ambush you as you walk down the aisle. Nowadays, many designers recognize the fact that brides want color options other than white or ivory, which means you can find a gown that is both the color and style you want. For a bold style, go with red or navy blue. Feeling sassy and luxurious? Try a gold, sparkly gown. If you want something unique yet still subtle, take a look at champagne pink. If you want something that combines traditional white with modern coloring, think about adding a colored lining or sash to a white gown. Go with what makes you feel the best!
2. You have to pay for your bridesmaids’ dresses.
Yet another big day tradition that has fallen by the wayside! You’ve asked your best friends to be your bridesmaids, they’ve accepted, and everyone is happy. Then you realize that you have to buy their dresses in addition to your own. Yikes! Footing the bill for the bridal party attire might have been the norm in the past, but no longer. In fact, many bridesmaids expect to pay for their own dresses. Just be considerate of the budgets of your girls. If you’re choosing the dress, be conscious of the price and communicate with each of your ‘maids about it. They’ll appreciate being asked instead of feeling like you’re demanding they spend a certain amount. Or, pick out a certain color or range of colors and have your bridesmaids pick out their own look. This option kills two birds with one stone: not only can your girls find a dress within their budget, but they will also be able to (hopefully) find a dress they actually like and feel comfortable in—and wear again!
3. DIY isn’t always cheaper.
In the age of Pinterest, DIY seems like the best option for everything, because it’s personalized and way cheaper than buying or hiring a professional. However, this isn’t necessarily true. I don’t know about you, but I can’t count the number of times that I’ve seen a necklace or a pair of earrings in a store, thought “I could easily make this myself,” and end up spending three times the amount on supplies and effort than the original piece cost. If you’re a DIY queen, go for it. But before you hop on the rustic wagon filled with burlap and mason jars, price everything out—including the time and energy needed for the DIY project—and compare that against the price of buying the same thing or hiring someone else to do it. The last thing you want to be doing is staying up late the week of your nuptials working on DIY projects, only to realize you should have just bought the hand-painted place cards instead.
4. Invite reciprocity.
You were invited to your old co-worker’s son’s wedding, and you feel like you need to return the favor. That’s a myth! Your wedding is a special day to celebrate the love you share with your fiancé, which means you don’t have to invite everyone you’ve ever called an acquaintance out of obligation. Obviously, you can’t decide your entire guest list based on whether you really want that person there or not—you maybe have some family members or friends who have to be invited no matter what. But when it comes to the reciprocal wedding invite, you shouldn’t feel any sense of obligation. Only invite the people you actually want to invite!
5. You shouldn’t pick the first dress, venue, etc. you find.
You’ve found the perfect gown, or location, or most delicious caterer. But there’s a problem: It’s the first option you’ve looked at. What if there’s something better out there and you’re making a huge mistake you’re going to regret? The myth is that you should shop around in order to get the best product for the best price. Most of the time, this isn’t true. For example, if the first dress you try on gives you happy butterflies and you just know that this is the dress for you, get it! When you’re planning your big day and those happy butterflies appear (whether it’s the dress, venue, flowers, cake, or music), listen to them. You shouldn’t feel like you have to ignore them and shop around. Because chances are, if you do end up shopping around, you’ll compare everything to the first thing and end up going with the first option anyways. Listen to those butterflies!
Eileen K Photography
6. You have to have the same number of bridesmaids as groomsmen.
This is another myth steeped in tradition that simply isn’t true. If the stars align and you and your fiancé have the same number of loved ones you want standing next to you, that’s great. But if you don’t, you shouldn’t feel like you have to search around for extra people to add, or cut important people out. If you’re worried pictures will look imbalanced, talk to your photographer and brainstorm arrangements that will create a cohesive look. If you want certain friends to be involved but not necessarily have them in the formal bridal party, make them an usher or personal attendant. Just like there isn’t a secret task force monitoring whether you wear white or not, no one will be offended by the fact that you have four bridesmaids while your future husband has six groomsmen. Include those important to you, regardless of whether the two sides match.
Lauren B Photography
7. You can’t find a budget-friendly bridal gown.
Thanks to the numerous shows about buying a bridal gown, it seems inevitable that you need to spend an arm and a leg to get your dream dress. This couldn’t be further from the truth! You can find the perfect look that fits both your style and your budget—no problem. The key here is to be completely honest with yourself about how much money you’re going to spend. Don’t want to spend more than $500? Set that as the absolute max, without saying to yourself, “$500 is my budget, but if I find something I really love I’ll make it work.” That’s where you can get into trouble. Especially when you start considering alterations, accessories, etc. Plus, sales exist in this industry! Seasonal and sample sales are definitely a thing—the Wedding Shoppe has them all year long! Check out the events of your local bridal shops and discover days to save. For an even more budget-friendly option, take a look in the bridesmaid dress section. Most bridesmaid gowns have white or ivory options, and because of the wide variety of different styles you can be sure to find the dress that fulfills your checklist without breaking the bank.
8. You shouldn’t hire a wedding planner.
It’s a common misconception that a professional planner isn’t necessary, especially because they cost more than they’re worth. While you might decide it isn’t necessary for you to hire a planner, you shouldn’t immediately rule out the option. A planner takes care of the logistics of everything, and can help you figure out exactly what you want. This is their job, so they know all the ins and outs of planning a big day. Plus, they’re there to make sure everything runs smoothly on the big day. Hiring a planner could take a lot of stress off of your shoulders.
9. You can get your friends to help you instead of hiring professionals.
Your roommate from college might be a prolific photographer on Instagram, but that doesn’t mean that he or she can—or should—be in charge of your precious pics. While there’s something to be said for having your friends help you with your big day, you don’t want them to miss out on the ceremony or reception because they’re busy setting up food or running around trying to organize things.
Brian Bossany Photography
10. Sit-down dinners can be expensive.
You want a sit-down dinner, but you’re afraid it’s going to be the most expensive part of your reception. On top of that, wedding food is notoriously bad. Not so! Talk to your caterer; you might find that a sit-down dinner is completely within your budget. Instead of having five courses with different entrée options, choose three courses with options that will work for all of your guests. Or, do a family-style dinner with communal dishes. This combines the best of both worlds in terms of a sit-down dinner and a buffet: it brings the table together and allows guests to eat what they want, while still maintaining the elegance and tradition of a sit-down dinner.
Brian Bossany Photography
11. You have to do it all yourself, i.e. your fiancé won’t help you.
There’s absolutely no reason to believe that your fiancé won’t help you plan. You and your fiancé are entering into a partnership by marrying each other, so of course the planning of your day should involve the both of you! The key here is to be open with communication, and to talk everything through. Be honest with what you need help with and make plans together. Make the planning a joint effort!
12. A DJ will play songs you and your guests don’t like.
This myth says that if you hire a DJ, you run the risk of suffering through the “Cha-Cha Slide” and “YMCA” every three songs at the reception. Not true! If you hire a DJ, talk with them beforehand about the style of songs you want and any specific tunes you want for the first dance, last song, etc. Most importantly, give the DJ a list ahead of time of songs you absolutely don’t want playing during the reception. This way there won’t be any surprises. Having a DJ also allows your guests to make requests, ensuring everyone will have a fun time dancing the night away and keep people engaged.
Tandem Tree Photography
13. A band will take too many breaks and bring down the mood of the reception.
Along the same vein as worries about DJs, many people shy away from hiring bands because they fear that the fun atmosphere of the reception will take a plummet whenever the band takes a break. Having live music creates a fun and warm environment, which is the perfect party atmosphere. When the band does take a break, have a playlist at the ready that will keep the party going.
14. Your wedding bouquet has to be traditional.
Just like wearing white, carrying real flowers down the aisle is no longer the only option. If you’re looking for a long lasting and personal touch, make your own bouquet (or buy one) out of paper, jewelry, and more. Try making your own bouquet out of the pages of your favorite book folded into the shapes of flowers, or flowers made of maps of places you and your fiancé have been or hope to go someday. If you still want a natural look, try colorful succulents for a rustic style or pine boughs and pinecones for a winter theme. Greenery is on-trend, so why not forgo the flowers entirely? The options really are endless. Different bouquet options like these will serve as the perfect physical memory from your special day, and can be easily displayed for years to come!
Brian Bossany Photography
15. You’ll spend too much money.
Many of the previous myths have to do with spending too much money, but let’s just debunk this myth that one more time. You can absolutely plan and have the day of your dreams without spending too much money. From DIY, hiring professionals, not buying dresses for your girls, the dinner and reception, and everything in between, there are multitudes of ways to save money and ensure that you have a fantastic day that still comes within your budget. It’s all about communication and research!
16. You “must” do anything.
At the end of the day, your wedding is about you and your fiancé. The biggest myth is that you “should” do anything! Wear black, wear white, have a traditional wedding, elope on an island, go crazy with Pinterest crafts and ideas, hire a battalion of people to get it done, or whatever else you want. If the big day is exactly what you and your husband want, then you’ve planned the perfect wedding, no matter the myths. You may also like...